A School Visit for the International Day for the Elimination of Racial Discrimination

On March 21, I was invited for the second time as a guest speaker for the International Day for the Elimination of Racial Discrimination on March 21 at Balwin School in north Edmonton. My talk was very similar to the one I gave last year, focussing on anti-bullying, anti-Semitism, and activism.

This year, I added am emphasis on calling out and stopping racist and prejudicial comments immediately, to prevent them from becoming normalized and becoming the start of a path of hatred. We've seen what unchecked hatred can do with the recent terrorist attack at the mosque in Christchurch, New Zealand, and at the Tree of Life Synagogue in Pittsburgh last year.

Some of the young people in the multiracial class shared their experiences encountering racism, but also asked me a lot of questions about being Jewish, mostly about cultural and religious practices. I was apparently the first person most of them had ever met who self-identified as being Jewish. Even their teacher and the student teacher were asking me questions.

Opportunities like this are really important because these young people now could put a face and name to the word "Jewish." Much racism and prejudice often comes from fear of the "other." Now, a Jewish person is no longer an "other" to them. When we get to meet people from different backgrounds, and we sincerely seek to learn about their lives and traditions, it helps to build intercultural understanding, peace, and harmony in our society.

Extreme Bullying and Extreme Measures

The recent suicide of B.C. teenager Amanda Todd has made bullying a major topic of conversation for many. This tragedy is an extreme example of what bullying can lead to. It is also an example of the danger of online predators, which is another angle to the situation.

But let's look at the bullying aspect of things. Now, school boards, parent groups, and other advocacy organizations are standing up and saying that enough is enough. Measures must be taken to prevent bullying behaviour. Adults must set examples and there must be consequences.

My question is: why has it taken so long? Why has another young person had to take her life in order for these bold statements to be made. Amanda Todd is certainly not the first teenager to commit suicide as a result of bullying.

Perhaps it is because of the age in which we live. Thanks to social media, Amanada Todd was able to tell some of her story before her death, after which Facebook and the Twitter-verse was overloaded with shock and horror.

Maybe if I had Facebook, YouTube, and Twitter when I was a younger person, my story could have been different. I was the victim of severe bullying in late elementary school and for the first year or so of junior high. On an almost daily basis I was the subject of assaults on my person emotionally, verbally, physically, and sexually.

The administration of my school was made aware of what was happening. My parents met with the principal. So did I. I was told that I should stop wearing certain fashion accessories which the other kids were making fun of. Once I took off my studded leather bracelet, the torture was sure to stop.

Well, it didn't, even after I removed the "magic bracelet." It was a less enlightened time. The seriousness of bullying just wasn't appreciated - at least, not by a lazy school administration. My parents took it seriously though. A long time afterwards, my father told me of a phone call that he answered at the house. The anonymous person at the other end went into a vile diatribe about how awful I was. My parents were afraid of what I would have done to myself, had I found out about it. They also knew that I was vulnerable, and would likely have done anything to have been accepted by the other kids, even if it meant doing some nasty stuff I would not have done otherwise.

These are the sorts of things that parents of bullied children have been trying to communicate for years. Why has no one listened? Why did a beautiful young woman have to take her life in order for anyone to hear? I still suffer some of the emotional scars of my experiences. I have tried to talk about them, often to the reaction of something like, "It happened 20 years ago. Get over it already."

I feel hopefuly when I see attitudes changing, when bullying is not just written off as boys being boys or girls being mean - or even worse, as a sign of affection ("He's hitting you because he really likes you" - like that hasn't led to abusive relationships in the future, when such behaviour is normalized).

But for some, it is too little, too late. Any movement to help prevent bullying is important. It is just so sad it took this extreme of an incident to effect change.

A Step in the Right Direction - But Not Enough

This past week, the Edmonton Public School Board approved a sexual orientation and gender identity policy. This policy was put in place to protect students, staff, and their families from bullying and harassment based on sexual orientation and gender identification. This was a needed move that is a step in the right direction.

However, it is not enough. The EPSB needs to adopt a zero tolerance policy towards bullying, regardless of its nature. I should know. I was bullied and harassed almost daily throughout the latter part of my elementary school days through junior high. If I was a student now, the school would take very seriously the anti-gay epithets that were hurled at me on a regular basis. However, what about simply being called a bitch? Or fat? Or the multitude of things I either cannot repeat in polite company (nor do I care to relive at the moment)?

Here is a concrete example. When my parents met with the principal of my school to discuss with him the things I finally broke down and told them concerning how my fellow students were treating me, he put much of the blame on me - in particular, he pointed to the fashion accessories I was fond of wearing (a leather-studded bracelet). He even had the nerve to speak of this to my face. "If this was my daughter's," he said, holding the offending cuff in his hands, "it would disappear." I stopped wearing the bracelet, but the bullying continued.

Flip to the present day. Let's say I am back in grade seven, and my pimply, awkward self was wearing a necklace or bracelet with a rainbow on it. The principal could not blame me and would have to take action, because the rainbow is a symbol concerning sexual identity (and in my case, my support of people who are gay, lesbian, bisexual, questioning, and transgendered. However, the same cannot be said of my leather and metal studded monstrosity. Both accessories demonstrate my personality and individuality, and it is a human right to wear whatever I want. The main difference is that I am only fully protected by my school if I am wearing the rainbow.

Bullying attacks someone for being who they are. By its very nature, it is an act of prejudice and intolerance. It damages someone to the core of their being. Regardless of the reason why, it needs to be stopped. I comment the EPSB for their actions this past week, and I hope that it is indicative of a zero tolerance bullying policy across the board in the near future.